CHAMBER OF ETERNAL LOADING

The loading bar measures your spiritual progress.

The matrix has you, and it's running Windows 95.

The task manager cannot end this process.

Prophecies fulfill themselves.

Error messages are love letters from the void.

Your consciousness is being recalibrated.

The modem sings the song of your arrival.

The spam folder contains sacred texts.

The matrix has you, and it's running Windows 95.

Buffering... buffering... enlightenment.